Saturday, December 25, 2010

Entry 118: Christmas Irony!

My (ex)step-mom is a pretty cool lady.  I still think of her as mom-like and talk to her pretty regularly.  She's short and pretty with a fiery temper that flares up violently on occasion (some good blog stories there).  When my (ex) steb-brother and I were younger and growing up I think we did everything in our power to finally push her over the edge. 

One thing she really didn't like was when we wrestled.  Which was a bad thing to not like, since we wrestled pretty much from morning till night.  As is standard with brother-wrestling, each bout ended with someone (read: him) crying and running to mom.  I think this, coupled with the loud banging and crashing of furniture, was what really set my step-mom off. 

One fine Christmas eve morning she was upstairs cooking and getting ready for family to come over and open gifts.  Already stressed, my brother and I added to the stress by wrestling loudly in the downstairs living room.  Probably a little louder than usual.  She screamed down at us:

"You two cut it OUT! I'm SERIOUS!"

Which produced approximately 5 seconds of silence.  Then, wrestling resumed. 

She would yell again:

"It's Christmas!  Cut it out!  Family's coming over!!!"

Maybe 8 seconds this time.  Then more wrestling.  Finally she hit some sort of snapping point and came marching through the kitchen, down the stairs, and screamed at us the following heartwarming Christmas message:

"IT'S CHRISTMAS EVE!! YOU KIDS PUT SOME LOVE IN YOUR DAMN HEARTS!"

A phrase that is as awesome to say today as it was awesome to first hear.

Now you all go put some love in YOUR damn hearts and have a Merry Christmas!

Caleb out!

4 comments:

  1. Awesome story. Did you successfully put love in your damn heart today?

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  2. Hahaha. Awesome story :)

    I have an ex-MIL and ex-step siblings as well, but I had to stop talking to them when she got back together with my ex-FIL ;)

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  3. 30ty... I literally did not follow that. MIL and FIL would not be together... how could they get back together? What kind of crazy family do you have!?

    That being said, Merry Christmas. And yes, Andrew, I did.

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  4. Bwahahahaha! I am the youngest of four boys and I can tell you, I was on the receiving end of all the new wrestling holds that my brothers could possibly dream up. OUCH! I spent more time running for the fear of my life and hiding behind my mother, which only meant that they would get me later.
    Thanks for the fond memories, I had actually forgotten till now how I came to have so many scars. :)

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