Friday, September 10, 2010

Entry 87: Gangsters


I'm out last night with The Johann.  Also, with a friend of his, "Gonzo." A few giant beers (always a good idea) at a Mexican restaurant and then we're off to our local douche/cougar den. 

I'll keep this brief. Johann is accidentally bumped by a linebacker from the Green Bay Packers (and if he's not, he should be) and spills his beer.  No big deal.  Gonzo is mostly drunk and has this half-smile/half "we doin' this?" look on his face.  He's trying to get the attention of Gigantor to- presumably- demand an apology and/or start a fight.  Johann is pleading with him that this is unnecessary and that it was an accident (not to mention that this would not be a good idea anyway.)

I, of course, am bored so I'm actually encouraging Gonzo a little bit.  At this point I'm thinking maybe it's Hispanic honor or something like that.  But no worries- this guy walks off not to be seen from again before any trouble starts.

Fast forward.  Enter into the bar 4 old Japanese guys in matching blue suits.  Gonzo wants to meet/talk with them.  Okay.  He introduces himself, then clams up.  WTH?  I'm left to carry the conversation, which I do (surprised?). 

Later.  Gonzo, drunk.  Japanese guys, gone.  Gonzo claims he had to chase them out.  How?  By telling them that they shouldn't mess with him, Johann, or me.  Repeatedly.  "Yeah, but... were they talking about messing with us?  Thinking of it? Starting it?"  Response: "No, but they needed to know."

I can see why he and Johann get along.

Gonzo is missing for a while.  Then he comes back.  With his two friends.  Who?  Two giant, stone-sober, rough and serious looking dudes that cautiously meet Johann and I, look around, and ask "We cool?"  A lot. 

Yes.  Gonzo brought in gangster reinforcements in case the 4 old Japanese men came back to start something. 

I know, right?

Also, Johann accused  Gonzo of being in the Taliban.

Believe it or not, I'm the normal one around here!

Caleb "Not in the Taliban" Shreves


  1. Japanese men are pretty sneaky with their little japanese feet shuffling all over their little sparkling linoleum floors.

    Totally unrelated but, apparently I need a credit card to open a paypal account?

    How can I donate!?? Audrey said she's help me figure it out.

  2. "Belief it or not, I'm the normal one around here."

    Hmm, I'm gonna go with... Not.

    That's like comparing yourself with Lyle Lovett and Woody Allen, and then claiming to be the attractive one.

    Process of elimination or not, you're not normal.

    Meant with love (and a little evil thrown in.)

  3. "That's like comparing yourself with Lyle Lovett and Woody Allen, and then claiming to be the attractive one." hahaha!