Wednesday, August 25, 2010


A bit intense, eh? 

Well, I've decided to join a fund-raiser for cancer and such.  Here's the link:

If I raise $600 I get to jump out of another airplane.  And I really want to.  And if I raise more than that, they'll give me a parachute. 

So what can I do to entice you to donate to the cause?  Let's break it down:

1. Guilt.  If you don't donate $15 to me, then you love cancer.

2. Shame.  After all the enjoyment you've gotten from my blog, you won't reciprocate with a measly $16?

3. Begging.  Come on please!?  Please? I really need it- cancer really needs it- come on, be a pal!?

4. Long-winded mathematical explanations of its feasibility.  Okay, $600.  That's doable.  If I get $17.64 from each follower I'll have hit my mark.  If I get just .09 cents or so for every time you click on my blog, I'll be there by September.  If one of you pledges all $600, I'll kiss you on the mouth.

5. Bribery. If you donate enough money, I'll do you a solid.  Hard to say what exactly, or how much you have to donate to get it, but you know me- I'm pretty reasonable and willing to, uh, do stuff.

6. Threats. Seriously- I work with all IT nerds.  If I find that you don't donate at least a small amount, I'll have them find your IP address and come to your house with a brand new beautiful kitten.  Then, months later, when you're in love with your kitten, I will sneak into your house in the dead of night and punch you in the face.

7. Ask nicely.  Okay, I don't even know how to begin with this one.  Lame.

I suppose that's all I got really.  I personally like #1 and will be using it as my campaign slogan for the next month.  Let's see if we can cure cancer, save boobs, and push me out of a plane, eh?

That being said, I'm on a quest to find a greasy BLT.  I've been inspired.

Caleb "doesn't love cancer" Shreves

PS I've secretly employed an 8th tactic to entice you to donate.  I've turned this post into a minefield of links to the donate page, but ONE of the links is to pictures of baby kittens.  You'll never find it unless you click them all!  Brilliant!


  1. HAHAHAHAH Thats awesome.

  2. ugh, I hate cancer too!

    Does this mean I have to create a paypal account? Jeez...

  3. Nope- you can just use a credit card!

    They have those in Canada, right?

  4. Yes WE do. But I don't.

    Paypal it is.

  5. I prolly woulda given more if a beautiful new kitten was jumping out of a plane, but alas, I don't love cancer. I hope it was enough, at least, to ward off that funeral you've been teasing us with, even though I'm still kind of excited about the bouncy house...
    Seriously, though, thank you Caleb, for taking the time and energy to do good on behalf of all of us.
    BIG love,