Thursday, May 13, 2010

Day 28: Perverted or Innocent? You Decide!

Here is a conversation that I had recently where I kept a straight face
(somehow) the entire time. Can you guess what the subject matter is?

Person ("Ginger") "No, Caleb, you have to stay the whole time it's in.
If it spills all over because you neglected it, then you're
responsible."

Caleb: "Why? Shouldn't it be working properly? I just put it in and
walk away and it should know when it's done. If it spills after that
then it's the responsibility of the owner."

Ginger: "Not if you don't put it in all the way!"

Caleb: "How am I supposed to know if it's in all the way; I just put it
in like I do every other time. I don't even think it will work if it's
not in all the way."

Ginger: "There's a little thing on the outside; if you don't put it in
past that then you can pump it in there but it won't shut off
automatically."

Caleb: "Dude, I don't even know how to put just the tip of it in. The
nozzle is like 6 inches and basically falls in all the way regardless of
what I do. I just put it in, walk away till its full, and expect it to
stop on its own."

Ginger: "Well then you have to pay when it sprays everywhere and you're
not close enough to stop it."

Caleb: "Bullshit. What if you were just standing there with it in and
expecting it to stop, but it didn't because it was malfunctioning and
all the sudden you're dripping wet and stink; you have to pay for that?"

Ginger: "Yes- that's why you should watch it closely."

Caleb: "Are you kidding? I don't have the attention span for that. I
get so bored sometimes that I don't even wait till its full before I
stop. I just quit wherever I'm at and leave."

Ginger: "Oh my God. You are SO ridiculous. Don't cry to me when
there's a puddle in the parking lot and you have a massive bill on your
hands. Cripes."


Did you guess it yet?? This is a pretty close paraphrasing of the
conversation. I, somehow, stayed serious and didn't crack once. Sadly
I don't think that "Ginger" had any clue as to how perverted the
conversation was. This, my friends, is why we need a full and complete
list. These non-perverts need our help! Speaking of, here are a few
new words for the day:

Gang
Fuzzy
Bag
Furry
Muff
Breast
Sack
Hairy
Surprise
Hoover
Carpet
Dirty
Bone
Hood

Thanks again to everyone who has read this Blog and didn't de-friend me
on Facebook! Rock on.

4 comments:

  1. I'm just guessing we're talking about pumping gas.... NO CLUE how you managed a straight face though...

    ReplyDelete
  2. I was randomly looking through blogs and found someone who wrote the following:

    I miss him so much. I really do. We did have a lot of problems with the distance and everything, but I really do miss him so much. He is still a huge part of me. I can still feel where he is inside of me.

    Reread that last sentence. Um... could the need for this innuendo-list be any more apparent? How could someone possibly type that and not see it as perverted?!

    ReplyDelete
  3. i feel that they didnt see it as perverted because they were to focused on the fact that someone they were very close to has left the in some way.. or they are just messing with ppl to see if they would say anything

    ReplyDelete
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