Wednesday, August 11, 2010

Entry 73: The Bank Teller

Citizens,

Last week I accidentally left my debit card in the ATM machine near where I work.  I went today to the bank nearby to see if they had collected it there.

I approached the young lady working at the bank counter who, though cute in a pancake sort of way, seemed very sad and unhappy. I explained that I lost my card and asked if she could check.  She did.  When she came back (with my card) I asked:

"How are you today?"
Her: "Fine."
Me: "Good.  'cause you look like your dog died or something."
Her: ::silence::
Me: ::blank stare::
Her: "No, I'm just tired today I guess."
Me: "Oh.  Okay.  'Cause I've seen more cheer in videos about the Holocaust."
Her: ::blank stare::
Me: "Well, see ya later!"

These are the conversations of my life.  A gentle wake-up call or a vastly inappropriate insult?  You decide!

Caleb "Seriously- the Holocaust sucked" Shreves 

6 comments:

  1. Oh my God, that is the best conversation EVER!!

    My B-i-l worked at a restaurant and had a Nazi of a boss, and when he told her working there was like working at Auschwitz, she asked him what that was..

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  2. Obviously that job was sucking the life out of her. Or she was a bug wearing a human suit. You decide.

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  3. I forgot to mention that, even though she was a skinny lass, she had FLAPS between her arm and chest. Like an old lady, even though she was young.

    Maybe that was what was dragging her down. Had I known I would have cheered her up by telling her "I'd still do 'er."

    I know, I'm a giver.

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  4. Well I can't lie if someone told me I looked tired I might stop listening (and/or plot my revenge to pee in their pool)...but that being said...if she was listening...I can't believe she didn't crack a smile at that holocaust joke...that was gold!

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  5. Poor girl. It expends so much energy to fake being nice.

    I was waiting to her to say that her dog did actually die. Awkward.

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  6. What is cute in a pancake kind of way? (I am dying to know!) No boobs, flat butt, shapeless face? (and eww)

    IHOP Down home ordinariness, but with a certain appealing healthy quality?

    I really want to know!

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