How nice is too nice?
If you look at the statistics (or just assume them in your own head) you will see that, on average, douchier guys have better luck with women.
Why is this?
Granted, no girl should be with an out-and-out douche machine. A guy that never respects a woman, treats her like crap, and acts like a raging ass 24-7 is not a good long-term match for a girl. But there must be something in the confidence of these types of guys that makes girls overlook the popped collar and backwards hat and give them a chance. Why?
Many theories on this subject abound. You can just scan the blogosphere and see 100 opinions on this matter, but my two cents is that women like confidence. Women like a man that goes his own way, knows himself, and -most of all- can be fun. Douchery sometimes looks like a weird form of confidence, and women aren't always great at knowing the difference (that and they're born optimistic romantics).
But some guys, for some reason, sacrifice some of their... manliness (for lack of a better term) in some sort of ill-conceived idea that they're doing the right thing for their girl.
The Nerv has recently gone through some life changes that have made him rethink his approach to dating. He has offered to write a guest post about the trade-offs between niceness and assertiveness, and I think you'll all enjoy it. His perspective is fascinating, because he is both lucky with finding women but also one of the nicest men around. You can guess how things usually work out for him!
He's notoriously tardy (like I mentioned yesterday) but hopefully this warm up post will entice him to hustle up and send me his work.
You'll want to read it.
So, ladies, what's your experience with nice guys and douches? Or, if you've found someone special for yourself (or a great husband like housewifey), why do they work out so well for you?
Hustle up, Nerv.
And get me my anthem recording!